Whether it’s our biological mothers or women in our lives who have served as “mother figures”, we all have received valuable lessons from the wiser more experienced women in our lives. The other day I went to see Dr. Maya Angelou who spoke at great length, during her performance, about the impact her “memaw” had on her.
While I never knew either of my grandmothers, Dr. Angelou’s words got me to thinking about my own mother and some things she has taught me throughout my life. My mother is an old-fashion, God-fearing southern belle. She tells it like it is and her wise words have saved me from many a dilemma and helped me reflect when I did find myself in a bind. These are some words that I reflect most regularly on.
Prayer changes things– My mother prays the kind of prayers that can turn any situation around. She is constantly praying for her children, her grandchildren, and her great-grandchildren. Because of her example, I have developed my own prayer life and know that when all else fails, I can go to God for guidance.
A man should love a woman more than she loves him-Take it easy fellas! You know we love you to death but there is something to be said about a man who will go to the ends of the earth for his woman. My mother role-modeled for me, how a woman should support her man with her love and be his rock but honey: if he ain’t willing to boastfully claim you and move mountains for you –keep it moving.
Don’t share too much of your love life with girlfriends– My mother always cautioned me to never let my girlfriends know exactly how good (or bad) I have it in my relationship. “You never want them to try and get what you got or fix what you broke.” In the same vein, you should stay out of your girlfriends’ love lives. This can be easier said than done but it’s best to just sit and listen when your friends are venting about their relationships because when they inevitably make up–she’ll be feeling some kind of way about you for bad mouthing her relationship.
Beware of women who speak ill (or too positively) of your man-We all know her. The cousin who’s always talking about how deadbeat your man is. Or the friend who can’t seem to resist the urge to mention how fine he is, etc. etc. Beware of them both!
If a dog will bring a bone, he’ll carry one– Meaning: if a person will talk about others to you, that same person will talk about you to others. Proceed with caution.
Learn as much as you can for as long as you can-Coming from a heritage where the privilege of education was not always afforded, my mother encouraged me to get as much “schooling” as I could. Education and knowledge however does not always come in the form of a degree so learning from others and seeking knowledge for the sake of personal growth and awareness is also important.
A woman should know how to take care of herself– It’s nice to be able to rely on someone or to be able to split the bills with someone but if you haven’t been left own your own yet the possibility of this happening at some point in your life is great. Learn how to do little things like balance a check, change a tire, or how to open up a life insurance policy for starters. Knowing how to do you is not a bad thing.
NEVER sit in an angry hair dresser’s chair– This one may sound crazy but it’s the truth! Come on. How much do we love our hair ladies? A lot right? So sitting down and letting a person who is pissed off at her significant other or YOU for running 15 minutes late for your appointment again is NEVER a good idea. That stylist is likely to do anything to your head. And then you’re left looking like what? Who did it, why and what for? That’s what.
A woman should keep a little mystery about herself– And this goes for all relationships not just romantic ones. People don’t need to know ALL your business. That’s what makes some women so alluring: she knows how to keep HER business to HERself.
Remember God– And lastly my mother always told me: “baby in all that you do, don’t forget God. Remember the one who has helped you get to where you are and he will remember you.”
What are some words of wisdom you have learned from your mother or motherly figures? Please share.
Happy mother’s day to all the moms out there!